i live on land known as no where land
the people around me want me dead.
but can i blame them?
if i want me dead, hell only knows who else wants me dead too.
but a mental need as well.
tell me that you want to fall in love with a joke like me..
his words calm me to the core,
and everything’s alright for the moment.
well, it’s time to satisfy my own painful needs.
everyday is that day, and to be happy is beyond my control.
dark lines are forming on my thighs.
they line up together, like soldiors marching twords the enemy.
though i know the scars will surely fade, theyre here now.
and for the moment, i will embrace them to myself.
the pain is indeed something i enjoy.
well, i was 3 weeks clean.. i missed it. i missed the slight burn i got from the blade slicing into my skin. the thin, long, dark red lines that covered my hips. i missed that moment of calmness after i cut. that peaceful night of sleep.. i craved it. i craved it so bad.
because one day, you’ll end up like me. one day you’ll believe that you really are happy. even if everything is so wrong.